The thing I posted extremely early this morning is still very much on my mind.  I'm still praying that I'm not pregnant but trying to think realistically just in case.  If I am, I have to go even further from my friends.  Husband won't even consider adoption, even though I think an open adoption would be okay.  But honestly, this early, we would have to move closer to family (his family, of course...) and play this whole hoping to get a transfer or get a job thing and hoping to find an apartment that will take us and the two cats and the two kids but also be big enough for said cats and kids (mainly the kids)...

But I'm probably stressing over nothing.

I mean, I thought of one of the perfect places to go... but then thought about the cats and how I probably couldn't take them there with me without them being outdoor cats (bad idea since I know that area and they don't like the idea of sharing territory, and either does the cat they would be sharing with).  Could suggest installing a door... Not sure about having to pay rent or not, but there's three bedrooms not being used and plenty of people to help with the kids while still ensuring our own independence with them as well as understand our rules and following them.  However, it is not exactly an environment I want my kids in for very long.  So that idea may as well just be scratched out.

*sigh*  This sucks.  Just the thinking about what could be happening sucks.  But I won't know for sure for another couple of weeks, so I'm probably just having pregnancy-like PMS symptoms...  Bleh!  I can't recall ever PMSing like this before.

Anyway, I need food.

Poison.